Ethical Values Vs. Moral Standards...take two...aaand Action!

The big questions are simply answered?

Though the idea subtle in difference, once reviewed it is easy to see both morals and ethics have a unique function in creating the world around us.  This is true for both the internal world we live in but also the social structures of the outside world. Collaboratively they formulate a series of life standards that one willingly selects to constitute identity.

Did I loose you?

To break it down:

Ethics are a system of moral values or principles in action, while morals are the base principles or basis of 'right and wrong' conduct; therefore the ethical values one possesses is a direct comparison to ones own standard of themselves. 

The very fiber of each countries identity is in direct relation to it's societies ethical principles. For example: Both Sweden and France have strong moralistic beliefs in a socialized structure where each man woman and child, as citizens, will be cared for from cradle to grave. Schools are free from grade one through university, health care is provided free of charge (to the extent that doctors will make house calls) and housing subsidies are provided for those that loose their jobs.  These identities are mimic by their citizens.  There is a social decorum or way of conduct that is upheld to the extreme occasion where the citizens up rise the government in order to retain such ways of living.  Though it may not be visible to the naked 'American' eye, These citizens tend to pride themselves in a sense of community that binds one another's beliefs that unite some countries citizens enough to create their collective social identity.

I've noticed that America has a moralistic view as well.  Ours is more rudimentary in comparison.  Some social structure have been set into place, so not to seem too third worldly to outsiders, but here; less is more.  We retain the 'freedom of choise' mindset.  Americans want to be able to choose who teaches our children and how much we pay for those teachers.  Everything is a la cart here.  Though to a degree the mindset can seem to some as though all Americans are equal opportunists only looking out for the next new thing in which to better or enhance, in someway, our individual way of living.

I don't mean to be so bleak and dismissive in my perspective of my fellow Americans, but if we've learned nothing of the way government works here, I hope that we at least absorbed the bare notion that we in a 2 party system; and are each struggling to retain power.  Both with an agenda that serves a purpose and a goal for those that are similar minded regarding such matters.  

"I want small government, and want to be able to run my business like an American should...freely." 

"I want government to oversee the wild and unmonitored actions of the business elite, so that we don't find ourselves in another financial, economic, or political rut that would negatively effect our nation or become the cause of a global detriment."

It's easy to find oneself in a bind.  Trying to discover personal identity while watching the manners of those around us.  Is it any wounder that we create pockets of society and view them in the same light that we paint them?  Just remember, no matter what notions you were predisposed to that have lead you to view the world in the way you do now; there is always time learn new morals on how to live differently.

Husam (Sam) Salman 

Oceans Away

Today something a bit different; a poem.

Oceans Away

This for the understanding

One for the money and two of the show

Three to get ready…

And before you go, reach out and call my name

Images of the moments

Glints of knowing through familiar smiles
Aching hands warmed with no body
Hugging pillows…eating chocolate

Sounds of the one, bridged into my ear
Lamenting the joy and the dream we share
When do you here?
These pillows don’t hug back


Husam (Sam) Salman

The Human Paradox - Part 1 - God Makers

As the human condition dictates and demands of us to ask questions as to why we are the only sentient beings in the animal kingdom while all other animals roam the earth in a dream like state in the constant search for food, shelter and procreation or basic survival; we find ourselves on a supernatural pedestal of sorts in that we allow our egos to reach the distance of supernatural proportions.

Growing up, I was reared with the idea that a supernatural being known as GOD resided in an ethereal place called heaven and looked after all mankind. This "GOD", as it was told to me, reigned above the idea of man as a holy omnipotent being beyond our reach. My greatest issue was the mundane existence mankind held; that we were not able to attain a sense of perfection for we are human and fallible. Though both true, I struggled with this mastery of the control of mankind and fought out the notion that I was less than that of a being I knew nothing about. “When law and duty are one, united by religion, you never become fully conscious, fully aware of yourself. You are always a little less than an individual.1” Please forgive me for this rant. I do not care to upset the masses, and will continue my point of view on "GOD" in a later blog.

Here, today, I want to discuss the matter of the creation of new gods or demigods. But in this instance these gods are not amongst the starts but rather are stars themselves.

As I flip through the pages of US Weekly or People magazine (don’t laugh), I see the sensationalism that constantly surround people like Julia Roberts or Jennifer Aniston. The flashing cameras of the relentless paparazzi or the ruthless cameras of TMZ seem to entice us more that our already giddy state; forcing us to hang every last word of the stars we have created. “A man who as a physical being is always turned toward the outside, thinking that his happiness lies outside him, finally turns inward and discovers that the source is within him.2”

Sometimes we allow others to be the heroes in our lives, perhaps to fill in the void of what we feel, we are unable to achieve. These documents of others lives are a physical and emotional experience, a palpable taste we can’t seem to get enough of. Have we defined the meaning of who we are based on the experiences of others?

Enough is enough, or so to speak. I look out in this world and have come to find that in each and every man, woman and child resides the ability to be a god amongst the stars.

In essence, we deem some individuals who have attained such fame to be the highlight in our lives so much so that we retain the idea of that individual as being superhuman. Why is it that such lives or omnipotent beings become idled in a manner that detaches them from us? When do we see ourselves equally valued to these beings so not to remove them from the fold or rather to see others as equals?



1. Frank Herbert 2. Soren Kierkegaard

Bitch Vs. Dick

In the day and age where technology is the prevalent form of communication and texting seems to be the only manner that matters. How is it that we are even heard? When I see a painting, it conveys messages and emotions that, on many occasion, well...most of the time, only surface in my mind. When I type in clear sentences, the message is transferred through sentence structure.

But alas, in the little phone that would, I have found that messages tend to take a misconstrued turn in favor of the reader's mood. Although I can write a single word messages such as "whatever", and have come to find on numerous occasion that though the intention is there; there as as many ways to perceive the message as there are ways to uses it...and then some.

More recently I have been trying to clarify such text to concisely depict the message, but at times these intentions are in vain. Messages with out the details and personability of the inflection of voice allow for misinterpretation of intention.

HELP! Please advise me on what the middle ground should become.

Though I know my messages are able to be quite long winded, I try not say too much so that I'm am not "that guy"; but also hope I am not seen as being a dick or a bitch.

"Thoughts?"

Truth and Consequences

Slowly the streets busy, the sidewalks a flurry with the buzzing energy of the new expression. Galleries flooded with splashes of face and foundry, of rife and distress. These are the episodes that one must endure to be an 'expressive artist'. And 'that' is just what finds its way to the downtown art walk.

In the middle of a no center point town, Los Angeles' downtown art gallery district becomes a dumping ground for the avid art hunter and the desperate but allusive Angelino art seeker.

High above the streets in an apartment built for two, two men were hosting a monthly tradition, the pre-art walk party. Sean and Dave (two friends) have graciously opened their doors to the wandering few that choose to venture so high and mingle with other like minded men. The drinks are bottomless, the atmosphere pulsing and witty repartee prevails.

Some nights, at this affair, there remains the inevitable chance that two people would reconnect. Last night was no different. I had the luck of finding a someone, whom I had written off as unavailable/uninterested; and that someone found me. Perhaps it's actions that dictate to the world who and how we are, and as such, last night, to me, was a reminder that connections are never severed but rather merely elongated by time and space.

Here is the title line: With truth, comes the reaction, or consequences. When you tell your girlfriend how bad her back cleavage looks in 'that' dress, one would imagine this as an advantage for her sake, but alas, such remarks leave one with the possible consequence of retaliation and vengeance...trouble is bound to erupt.

How is it then, that when someone professes emotions to a friend, family member or loved one; does that person take such news as defamatory? Why do we spend so much time on the defensive that we fish an insult from the mouth of a complement? When does the truth have to stop in order to keep egos happy and life in balance?

The 28th Dress

In the day and age where man has come to see that we, as a people, are taking a close hard look at our financial futures, as well as that of the ones we love; aka, family!

Now that we take a second thought to making that large purchase, whether it for fashion, for a car, a house or appliances; we are also thinking twice about the potential (or for some, inevitable) finding that special someone to call our own. The potentials and advantages of having a spouse, legally speaking, will give several advantages come the end the year.

And more still, the affair itself. Knowing that one day or night you will be either draped in a gorgeous wedding gown or suited up in a formal tux. The much needed things that create for us the idea of that perfect moment, are priceless.

Priceless, but at times come well equipped with a hefty price. How much are we ready to pay before we say "I do!"?

The average US couples spend $19,581 for their wedding. In order to have that wedding you'll need a wedding ring, and perhaps you'd like to go on a honeymoon when the affair is said and done. How stimulating! To the economy that is, and the idea of this institution not only allows the merritt to call someone legally and biblical binding, but as previously mentioned gives it's fringe benefits.

On the order of 1,400 legal rights are conferred upon married couples in the U.S. Typically these are composed of about 400 state benefits and over 1,000 federal benefits. Among them are the rights to:

• Joint parenting
• Joint adoption
• Joint foster care, custody, and visitation (including non-biological parents)
• Status as next-of-kin for hospital visits and medical decisions where one partner is too ill to be competent
• Joint insurance policies for home, auto and health
• Dissolution and divorce protections such as community property and child support
• Immigration and residency for partners from other countries
• Inheritance automatically in the absence of a will
• Joint leases with automatic renewal rights in the event one partner dies or leaves the house or apartment
• Inheritance of jointly-owned real and personal property through the right of survivor ship (which avoids the time and expense and taxes in probate)
• Benefits such as annuities, pension plans, Social Security, and Medicare
• Spousal exemptions to property tax increases upon the death of one partner who is a co-owner of the home
• Veterans' discounts on medical care, education, and home loans; joint filing of tax returns
• Joint filing of customs claims when traveling
• Wrongful death benefits for a surviving partner and children
• Bereavement or sick leave to care for a partner or child
• Decision-making power with respect to whether a deceased partner will be cremated or not and where to bury him or her
• Crime victims' recovery benefits
• Loss of consortium tort benefits
• Domestic violence protection orders
• Judicial protections and evidential immunity
  and more....

I'm still vague on the concept that this institution should be reserved for those that marry outside their gender. If we look at the grand scheme of things, allowing everyone into this institution would solve some civil unrest, but also have the possibility to impact the economy in a fascinating way. Say that marriage is allotted as a right to all men and women regardless of the sexual identity of the one they choose to wed. Look at the possibility of how many more weddings would be entered into, an already saturated market base that generates over 40 billion dollars a year. Can you say "Big money?" Let's be real, some gay men would lavish at the opportunity to plan his own wedding.

I can see it now; a large white wedding dress/tux combo marching down the isle, doves being released just as the 'I do's' are being said. The men are happy, the registers of the local marts would be a bit fuller and merchants happier still. Let's take another look at this possibility before we turn a blind eye to ideological differences and antiquated ideas of the newly emerging idea that we call marriage.

Memoirs of a Gay Addict - Part 7 - Enter Silence

Agoura Hills? Though the sound of it was rather ominous, I decided to rescue Fade-Dra just the same. I drove until there was no more light in the sky but the twinkling embers of my cigarette falling into my ashtray as I tapped out my cigarette. I reached the modest 12 bedroom castle wedged in the hillside of some forgotten Los Angeles "THE Place to Live." I parked my old (old compared to modernity and the like) 1999 Mercury Cougar on the side of the road behind, what I presumed to be the limousine that transported the cast to this lush abode, Fade-Dra being one of these said passengers.

At the gate I was greeted by two half-whit, barley legal, security guards in kilts. Needless to say, I felt no threat or hesitation to approach the check-in table. There I was brashly greeted by a jangly gay man and his not so whimsical girl counter part. They asked my name and rushed through two clipboards looking for my name. I knew they wouldn't find it, due to the fact that I didn't RSVP. "Sir, how did you hear about this event?" "Fade-Dra," I replied. They began to look at one another in awe and dismay, as though I just spoke to them in tongues. "She's a drag queen, performing here I think." "OH, the one in pink!" "Go ahead, she's up the stairs to the left."

Upon arrival at the top of the steps I was greeted by a merman swimming in the pool. Rather odd pet I thought to myself...and I don't see the fun in it, but 'ups' to the host, for being the only man ballsy enough to have such a liability swimming about unattended. I glared across the open bar and tried to rest my eyes on anything that resembled new collection pieces, interesting jewelery, shoes that weren't purchased at a mall discount store, but to my disappointment, I found none.

What became of you night, what offers have you in store for me tomorrow, for tonight I stand here alone in my fantastic fabulous-ness, only to be surrounded by relics of the past in beige khakis and double breasted waist coats...for women! Eeek!

I was able to find Fade-Dra, who, at the time, was four or five sheets to the galling winds! After the music started, as we were there for a record release party...I glanced at the video of a priest pressing upon the face of a disturbed young man, a large ornate cross. I glanced over to fade-Dra and nodded "it's time".

As we coasted down the highway from nowhere ville America back to the 'civilized' world, I wondered; were we all destined for such a fall from greatness as witnessed by me at this "Party"? Will I one day not care that I am wearing pinstripe pants with a polka dot shirt?

The evenings efforts were not all lost in the hills of the forgotten realm. We finally ended up at a good friends house, where we proceeded to purchase a 'pick-me-up' if you will, one that isn't too too much but enough to get us through the night. The night took a turn for the better as I saw a great man Jimmy Jasmine, who was impressing me with his Crass t-shirt that was written in Arabic. I strolled through the Eagle, a leather gay bar planted smack dab in the middle of Silver Lake, CA. My efforts were not lost, as I saw some rather interesting creations of style and grace. though I thought the idea of charm to be lost in such an audience, I was happily pleased to find some men really care about how they looked before they walked out the door. I love gay men and our sense of style.

The night ended abruptly, when Fade-Dra motioned me to the exit...as I sat at on Mike's designer sofa (Fade-Dra's roommate), I contemplated what I had just witnessed. The abomination of some of the outfits at 'the party' didn't closely resemble fashion, and yet the styles of the men at the gay bar were above and beyond some Parisian runway gave me a sigh of hope. "Perhaps I am destined for a better 'look' for the rest of my life. I mean if the company I surround myself with has any indicator as to who I am and how I like living; I feel, for now, this life will be lived with an ease of knowing that I too make the mark of fashion in Lost Angeles.

In the Throngs of Love

I think I'm diabetic now that I've flipped through all the candy catalogues. My eyes are hungry with desire, my ears yearn to hear 'I love you', muttered just one more time. Oh, in the arms of love just once again. I feel so young again with such thoughts. My heart raced at the sight of a chiseled man...how I enjoy a man's sweet embrace.

But alas, all my wants are for not; my only sexual ventures start and end with the hands that clap. But all is for not, not hopeless that is to say, not without meaning, purpose in absence. This is the inner being living out loud. And what do you hear? In this state before your peers. Do you wear it on your sleeve? Or is your sleeve heart shaped and emblematic of the true inner self. What about something as simple as a color. Are you red and spicy? Are you blue and blue? Are you green with eco-friendliness or envy?

Though not a direct response, as some of us don't own all that much clothing as variations or options...but isn't that it's own recognition? "I (someone else) only own two jackets, five shirts, three jeans and one pair of Khaki slacks." Isn't that person giving a comfort of life display that is simply depicted through these simple staple garbs?

Another simple observation of how and why...though there are many more whys then I have time to list. Take care.

Customer Service

The decline of social shopping is typically a direct response to society’s refusal to be subjugated to an insufficient response from ‘upper management’, to filter down proper marching order to facilitate the proper act of engaging a customer while in a retail environment.

How many times have you gone to buy a car and the guy wouldn’t take ‘NO’ for an answer. How many times have you been to the dentist (that reminds me, I have to get one) and had him or her try selling you a ‘special’ toothbrush, in that: “All your teeth will fall out if you don’t buy this now, and while they are running a ‘special’.

Why is that we have to lure the shopper and coax them into buying something, that if you took down all the smoke and mirrors, that looks simple, perhaps even cheep. I remember when the economy was up and disposable fashion was at an all time high, the daily retailer didn’t stock the stores with employees, but rather with clothes that would be overstuffed onto the racks and were falling off onto the floor with no one to pick them up. Now though, after the economy took a slump and retailers took a hard look at sales to square footage ratios, they found that they were loosing money on markdowns at the end of ever season. The stores staffing stayed at an industry standard low, and with the teen trend model working the cash register, what more can be said but no wonder that retail is failing!

Get me an eager person, who knows that it is hard to find a job out there to want to assist me and give great customer service, why else would I return? Do I really need another casual jacket or wrap-around scarf? Give me the goods good, and I’ll give my loyalty as a customer to return to those that take care of me best!

Winter Weight

Thought the seasons have come and gone, the tide of our diets are now in a slow up-swing. Never before have we, as a people, thought so intently on loosing those unshakable, unwanted pounds. Though this isn't a new fad by any stretch, it, now more than ever, has become a want of epidemic proportions.

Everyday, while skimming though my recorded television, during my fast-forwarding through the adverts, I notice, just how many ways we look at weight as an issue. Diet pills, drinks, pills, meals, pills, clinics, pills, pills pills...and the occasional weight loss program special with Dr. Good-Fella.

Then the trickle down effect takes occurs, the exercises equipment, the fitness gyms; all a side effect to the dietary need. And finally, the conclusion of the circus comes on hanger filled racks with pretty trim and accessories dangling in department windows..."This is the answer!" Perhaps two answers for that matter, one: I feel better when I shop; and two: Finding that next new now necessity that will not only look new and pretty, but will be specially fit to hide those unwanted curves.

Though nothing can fully answer the winter gloom (except a weekend getaway in Cancun), one thing is for certain, Spring is just around the corner. Perhaps not soon enough for some.

Earthquakes Shake My Pants!

In a time of struggle and strife, I wounder, what is the best next buy? Are we, now in the slow upswing of our recent recession, looking for the better buy, or greater still, not buying unless absolutely necessary?

The other day I strayed into a shop, of sorts, and sniffed about for that 'must have' item. In my ventures, I located a fascinating jacket with the most charming details. I said to myself, before I 'have to have it', I'd like to know how much my needs might be costing me. To my dismay, the cost was in the ballpark of $950. Not too too bad for a fine garment, but a jacket of this caliber and workmanship, wasn't deserving such a austere price tag.

Though my viewpoint may have been overshadowed by my lack of disposable fashion funds, I decreed then and there that this Need Vs. Want idiom should take hold; I found myself in the act of futility...it was helpless to contest reason. Perhaps next time fashion will prevail, but for now, for me, I resolve on knowing what I need is more pressing than my whimsical wants.